Meditation for February 24th, 2016
Being Good Enough
Since you were able to understand language, teachers, parents and Facebook memes have been telling you you’re good enough. The message that permeates all spiritual growth programs is that you are perfect the way you are. You are a unique snowflake and no one is like you, so embrace yourself.
This is the biggest illusion of all. You are actually not good enough. You don’t know enough, you are not strong enough, there is always someone prettier, better and smarter than you. If you were good enough, why would you be reading a daily meditation blog? Because deep down inside you know that you could be so much better than you are.
You have spent your entire life worried about what others think about you, so you try to dress a certain way, like certain cultural icons and talk and act a certain way, but all you are doing is copying others. You are a snowflake, but one that has already landed in a snow drift and is unidentifiable from all the other snowflakes in a giant white hill on top of a white Suzuki Sidekick somewhere in New England. There is nothing special about you. Accept that you are similar to a lot of people and start acting like it.
We strive for perfection, but being perfect is not attainable. Why are you going to even try? Why not accept being a mediocre person who is not going to have any impact on history. Don’t just be humble; be humiliated with everything you’ve become.
The best way to grow is be torn down to the bare bones and built back up. I am doing this right now by telling you that you are not anywhere good enough. Let’s start over. Let’s throw away all that garbage you thought was important and begin something new. You can be whatever you want, so stop trying to be stupid things.
God of Self-Help Memes and Inspirational Quotes,
I beseech you to actually help me,
I am lost,
I have wasted my youth becoming something that doesn’t matter now that I am an adult.
I spent all my money on clothes, records and going to shows and now I have nothing to show for myself but weird tattoos and a dishwashing job at nearly 40.
Help me find the real me.
Because I fucking did all this leather mullet rock thing to get laid and now I’m a creepy old guy who is trying to buy young girls Old Crow and PBRs like I did twenty years ago when I was young and not creepy.
Now I am alone and I look at you, inspiring quote from Mark Twain, the Dalai Llama or Ursula K. Le Guin to help me find myself that I ignored my entire twenties and thirties instead of investing in myself.
I’m as old as my parents were when I graduated high school and living in a basement in a house with five other lost souls on a mattress on the floor with a Red Fang and Megaton Leviathan posters on my wall and not a single piece of clothing with any color so I look like a mime from a Mad Max movie.
Please inspire me to grow up twenty years too late.
Help me to be the man I ought to be instead of the man I thought I fought for at community college those three times I went.
So self-help quote on a serene beach scene, a mountain reflecting a sunset or a trail winding through a beech tree forest, give me an idea who I really am.
A tarot deck is a must have for the spiritual inspiration on the go. You can sit anywhere and do a quick spread to give you a pick me up or find help with a direction or decision you need to make.
Find a tarot deck where the symbols speak to you. There are many to choose from. Some are traditional while others can get very creative. Some are just novel, but can be useful if you understand the symbols.
For finding yourself, start each morning for thirty-one days with three cards at first in a row.
Card one is who you secretly are
Card two is what’s blocking you from being that person
Card three is the action you can take to become the real you
After deciphering the first three cards take a fourth card and put it above the first three. This card is why you will never be the real you ever no matter how hard you try, so stop playing around with witchcraft cards and go to work. God, you are weird.
The real lesson here is no matter how hard you work on yourself there is always room for more growth. Even if you find yourself coming out of the darkness with some of the things you are trying to let go, this is just to make room for more stuff you have to learn to let go. This process goes on ad infinitum, and this is why it is great news that we are mere mortals, for working on oneself for longer than a century brings a real insanity that humans are unable to fathom or tolerate.
So pick and choose what you work on and make a good priority list because you’ve already wasted your life up to this point thinking you are just good enough the way you are.