Meditation for March 11th, 2016Being Invisible
A lot of people crave attention. People walk around in funky clothes or riding tall bikes and wearing top hats and a curled mustache just so people will notice them. We talk loudly at parties then pout if there is competition or aren’t getting the center stage. In a practice of mindfulness sometimes we must become invisible and just be.
It is hard to not be noticed if we are walking among people. We basically must wear camouflage to hide in plain sight. Some people walk around just noticing people that don’t want to be noticed so they go up to them and make it clear that they noticed.
A good deflection is to always look like you are going to ask someone for something. Carry a lighter and look at someone as if you are going to bum a cigarette and you will suddenly be transparent like Predator stalking Dutch and his squad of special force commandos. Maybe stick your hand out like you want a coin or two put there for bus fare. Usually looking like you are bumming something will help become unnoticeable.
People will ignore any kind of sign that tells them where to go or what to do. Put a suggestion or how to guide on your shirt and watch as everyone looks away because they want to pretend they didn’t see the sign when they try to do it their own way. Stand at a bank or grocery store with a sign on your shirt that says, “Line starts here.” and watch as people will try to start a line anywhere but there because you are a living ghost.
Like the want something look, walking around with a binder or a clipboard covered in hippy stickers will make you look like a person collecting for Greenpeace or Children’s International. People will literally look right through you or suddenly get a phone call.
This might sound counter intuitive, but yelling and looking very aggressively hostile will clear away any crowds that might have noticed you for who you really are, so now they are scared that you are going to wear Thor skin like a wetsuit makes them blind to you.
Remember that a lot of times being invisible is just walking with confidence and purpose. If you look like you’re supposed to be there then people forget you exist immediately. No need to don a ninja pajama or a ghillie suit.
God of Eternal Darkness & Blindness,
help to get from this place
to that place,
without telling seven people I don’t have change,
even though I just complained about schlepping around this seventy-three cents since this morning,
but I sure am not giving it to these bums.
Help me drift by unnoticed,
or be in the wake of larger people and shoot ahead when the larger person gets the sad sob story.
Help me to remember to place a hand on my pocket so that the little change in my pocket don’t go ching-a-ling-a-ling.
Remind me to not light up this cigarette until I’m out of this danger zone.
Why didn’t she see the sign that says the line starts here?
Why did he not notice the label that says decaf?
Why is this car suddenly hitting the breaks hard when the lane ends even though there has been signs saying the lane is ending and now this driver is yelling at me because the car needs to get into my lane?
How did this person think that she could park in a fire lane because she was getting her hair done and now she is getting her car towed to her horror and is yelling profanities at the tow truck driver?
Why is this person putting all of his stuff on the last remains table at this coffee shop before ordering?
Why was this person waiting for the bus, waiting for the light to change so the bus will make it to the stop, wait while three other people board the bus and then look through all of your pockets, bags, folds and in your hat for your ticket before finding it tucked into the sleeve on your coffee?
Why would you drive very fast and pass me to just slam on your breaks and then turn on your turn signal?
Making your own ghillie suit.
First get an old army jacket and pants.
Cover the jacket and pants separately with netting. See the netting loose to the clothing.
Find burlap and separate them into individual strips.
Tie the strands of burlap to the netting in strands of fifteen to twenty strips starting from the bottom and working your way up.
Boom! Now you can stalk your pray or hide in tall grass and bother people like a camouflaged pro.
People don’t notice you as much as you think. People are so concerned about what they look like they don’t notice what you are wearing or how your hair has so many fly aways.
One time I was at a discotheque dancing to the funk. I noticed these three very attractive ladies looking over at me. I made sure I put a little more oomph into my dance moves thinking that these babes were scoping out the dfish merchandise, but as I did a spin move, a real dfish signature, I noticed that I was dancing right in front of a huge mirror. These young ladies weren’t scoping me out, they were looking at themselves! I learned a huge lesson that day.
If life is an illusion, be an illusion.