Meditation for March 12th, 2016Daylight Savings Time
It is that time of year again when Americans are setting their clocks one hour forward, except if you are in Arizona, but they were also the last state to recognize Martin Luther King Blvd Day. This means more light in our day and the upcoming changes in seasons.
Daylight Saving Time is a very stressful time for us who have the touch. It messes with time, astrology, moon cycles & basic applications of scrying on reality since it has been altered.
Think about astrology being off by one hour – a fake hour mind you. This alters the projection of star based will on a person’s life; possibly even sending people down the wrong road. Dreams never realized, lovers never meeting, brash decisions on finances ill advised. The very placement of all the planets, moon & stars need to be in their precise position at the precise time or the universe becomes pure chaos & we find ourselves without direction.
The very placement of the moon in the night sky helps the shaman roll his bones seeing futures & pasts, but the moon is an hour ahead now so the shaman withers and dies with no true power.
The Tarot Card deck is obsolete between March & November since one of the signs in the symbols is the very stars. This means Gypsies and Seers must shed their true paths for part time jobs at Marshall’s and Jamba Juice.
Then there is just trying to rest & meditate with a whole missing hour. This hour has been stolen. You will find yourself always one hour away from rest & enlightenment. You will be weakened by this time thief.
The final argument is George W. Bush extended the daylight savings time by four weeks under the guise of saving energy. You know that nothing that evil imp did was for good, so when you are enjoying the extra sunlight, remember you are enjoying Bush and therefore want Trump to be president. Math.
Also it is complete hell on baristas, bakers and other early risers.
Prayer
Time,
Thank you for going in the right direction,
Instead of taking a sudden left,
And slicing through all of my parallel realities,
And severing my timelines.
Let’s talk time to feels ratios.
I need you to feel more slow when I’m enjoying life.
In need you to hurry it up during my working hours.
I need that 8 minutes between snoozes to feel like a week,
And the time between breaks at work to be blink of an eye.
And the time between clocking out of work and the next time I click back in be like a year.
You can do anything you want, you’re Time!
I need to not spend long periods of Time not sleeping and thinking about all the mistakes I’ve made or how I sort of want to watch the hour of fifteen minutes of the Garfield movie I didn’t see.
I need for the bus to get me to work on time, but feel like I’m sitting down forever.
Starbuck,
This is the most oppressive day in a barista’s life.
It says 5,
but yesterday it was 4.
My hour has been robbed.
I’m more sluggish making non-fat lattes,
I’m barely able to concentrate on this mocha with extra shots.
Did they say cardamom or vanilla?
I think I fell asleep waiting for this bagel to toast.
No amount of going to bed early
Or naps will ever repair the damage done by daylight savings time.i might start to get used to it
In August.
Amen.
Craft
Here are a few ways to keep your home daylight saving time proof and not having time’s nutritious energy from working out leaving you weak and alone. Always have a VCR on and 12:00 blinking for eternity. Leave a second always on your microwave so the time doesn’t show. Don’t have sunlight in so that it is hard to tell what time of day it is at all times. Always use different methods to get to work. Never get into a scheduled time to leave for work in the mornings, use different busses and routes, switch to cars, cabs, Uber, Lyft, bike, skateboard, inline, walk, run, pogo, razor scoot or teleport. Don’t ever do anything at the same time two days in a row. Keep the false time confused and bewildered so that it can’t hurt you.
Goal
There is no goal really. Unless congress retracts daylight savings time or move to Arizona, you can’t escape the torturous time change. There will be relief in November when we get that hour back like an early Christmas present.
It should never be bad enough to move to Arizona. That state is like the inside of an oven at a concentration camp all the time.