Meditation for January 7th, 2017
We live in an age where the information and ideals needed before the first date is astronomical. If we listen to the love song of yesteryear, we hear that people fell in love without even m owing the person’s name. Now we have online apps with matrixes so that we can find the perfect mate.
It’s like the idea of dating someone and breaking up is a sign of complete and utter failure.
Some look for red flags. They think that certain signs mean that the person is isn’t a good dating possibility. Not long enough since their last relationship, a serial monogamist, not monogamist enough, not in enough relationships, and any other kinds of clues from their past.
Basically people want to date a virgin they don’t have to coach.
When you date someone with red flags, you are dating someone that isn’t a blank slate. What they say to you, treat you, make love to you is the accumulation of all their past lovers.
Someone who isn’t that experience is a blank slate. This person can be chiseled to match your ideals. Younger partners are great this way. Older people are stuck in their ways and can’t be taught new tricks.
Juliette is 13 when she falls in love with the 28 year old Romeo. She falls for Romeo’s come one that he has sharpened in the decade and a half experience he has garnered.
People say they don’t want the responsibility of dating a virgin. They don’t want the kind of attachment that happens for a virgin and their first.
People want someone with one or two red flags, so that they have some experience, but not so many that they are completely not willing to compromise and not less so that there is a responsibility and training that needs to be done.
Basically no one should be getting in any relationship ever because no one has any fucking idea what they are doing. We live in a time where there is too much information on dating, but divorce is still rising.
The average American marriage lasts 4.5 years.