Meditation for January 12, 2016
We have to live on this planet together and sometimes we have to work and or be in close proximity with other humans. We have to get along at family gatherings and holidays, we must be polite to one another while we wait in line at Forever XXI and we rub shoulders at the stalls at major sporting events wearing opposing team uniforms. Sometimes all we can do to get along in this world is to tolerate people and their weird behavior.
Why do people get some of these weird behaviors like talking loudly on the phone or to themselves? Why do people cut in line at the bank? Why would someone choose to put too much cologne or perfume on? What would possess someone to dress like a marching bandleader? Where did someone get the idea that they can eat Doritos with an open mouth? People choose these annoying traits because no one stopped and yelled at them.
Go out from here, Spiritual Child, and correct some of these behaviors with strong stern lectures. Some just need a simple, STOP IT! Others will need long hand waving in the air swear word peppered rants. Only you can bring someone to be able to be tolerated. If you don’t, no one will and this person will be an annoying anchor on civilizations’ ever advancing progress.
Old Guy Who Lives on Clouds with Chicks with Harps,
make me be your shining light,
to your lost children’ prickly ways,
make my voice drown the rationalizations, excuses and reasons
for being a thorn in your chosen ones’ paws.
He Who Used to Smite,
allow me to be your lightning and judgment,
allow me to demonstrate your law as it was given to me somehow,
allow me to correct the devil’s ways in others.
God Q. Smith,
Let me be the nun’s ruler.
P.S. how abouts that Powerball doh.
Learn to cross-stitch and cross-stitch a list of things that really annoy you. Pick out the things people do that make you eye roll, sigh, say, oh God out loud, that make you close your eyes and shake your head while breathing out through your nose, the things that when the person gets out of sight you throw a punch through the air and say, what the fuck! Put those on fabric using a sweet font and border it with ivy and little flowers and put it up on your wall at home or at your work so you can just point to it when someone is being annoying.
Try to take this practice of Spiritual Correcting and help your boss at work be more tolerable. Pick out one defect of character your boss does and correct it by teaching that person a lesson. Come up with ways to embarrass or humiliate your boss when they are being annoying. Let all the other workers know the trait you are trying to help your boss overcome, but don’t directly tell your boss, just mutter under your breath when they are doing it and watch as they become grateful for all your hard work.
If your boss is a Leo this Goal might be impossible. They are impervious to passive aggressive attempts to be less annoying.