Meditation for May 23rd
Risk of Meditation
If you scour the Internet or delve into any bookstore, you will find endless information on mindful practices. Corporations are using mindfulness as a radical approach to help make their employees more productive and reduce turnover. When someone says they’re meditating, you think they are doing something extraordinary, but warn them of the dangers.
Yes, meditation is a great way to avoid adverse reactions. However, it can be dangerous. Nothing is without its risks, and the idea that something is risk-free is ridiculous and naive. Anything you can overdo is dangerous.
When one truly meditates, one delves deep into oneself to find strength and wisdom hidden in the unconscious folds of the mind. If one is not careful, one can cause oneself a panic attack, anxiety, mania, and even psychotic breaks. Practice your meditations with ease, and don’t meditate if you feel confused or too morose. There is a fine line between meditation and overthinking.
Knowing how intense your meditation should be is a great way to stay safe from having adverse reactions. If you are a sensitive sort, maybe don’t delve into the wilderness where there are no maps or trails. Just keep music on so you can find your way back. Yanni or the Shins are great meditation musical shamans. It is fine to only do three to five minutes instead of attempting half an hour.
If you are a thinking person, do not try the emptying of the mind meditation. In an intense meditation where your mind is clear and one of your healing stones isn’t lined up correctly, you might be unable to awaken again. You will be in a vegetative state for all eternity until a person of royal blood and your one true love kisses you, but that won’t happen because you were too busy being a narcissistic new age person to attract anything real and deep.
Suppose you are into the more Western meditation approach, where you actually use your brain as God intended. In that case, you will have to be careful about how you phrase your meditative mantras, for using the wrong words in the wrong order will awaken a long-slumbering old God from the deep whose only wish is the total enslavement of humankind. This has happened way more than you think.
Don’t mess with your subconscious so much. Playing God with your dreams can jeopardize others. In some cases, someone dreams that someone they know is a mermaid, and the dreamer will catch the mermaid and make the mermaid fall in love with them. Still, when they wake up, they find out that the person who was the mermaid in their dream was found dead in the bathtub, and there is no explanation why the person was taking a bath in their pajamas. Don’t be a dream murderer.
Learn to ward your meditation room with protective runes and powerful stones, and burn the right herbs and spices for a deliciously safe meditation space. Line the boundary of your house with an unbroken wall of salt. The wall between the real world and the supernatural world is thin when one is in a trance, so one has to protect oneself from the long, dark claw of evil or the calling of the deep abyss.
Prayer
The One Who Lives in My Buddha Incense Holder,
Okay,
Here goes some mindfulness. If it’sn’t comfortable.
Maybe if I sit on this bench I paid $86.99 for.
Okay.
Ohm.
Shit, sitting cross legged is not comfortable at all.
Ugh, I’m all stiff and tense.
Let’s move this pillow over here.
Okay.
Ohm.
Sigh, I should return that work email.
I’m not on salary, but if I want to be I oughta show that I can be depended on.
Fuck, why?
I’m not at work.
I’m fucking meditating.
I shouldn’t think about work when listening to sitar music and burning incense.
Okay.
Ohm.
I mean, if they want me to answer emails on my day off by weakening the walls between here and there, then they’ll have to let me clear my brain.
Okay.
Here we go.
Ohm.
Mmmmh, tacos
Amen.
Craft
Here are some protective wards you can do to protect yourself while meditating.
Crystals: surround yourself with hematite, black tourmaline, obsidian, labradorite, jasper, bloodstone, and don’t forget, Slam! Duh duh duh, let the boys be boys! Onyx.
Set the stone all around you—the more the merrier. If you found them, you’ll be more attuned to them.
Wards: By weakening the walls between here and there using basic designs of a shield or a net, one can ward off the evil ones. Use salt.
By (element) , I ward thee:
Guard this space from all ill will
and all those who wish me/us harm.
Incense: The power of smelly smoke has kept dark magic and demons at bay for thousands of years.
Blueberry, frankincense, honeysuckle, lotus, myrrh, pine, African violet, Althea, benzoin, cedar, Rosemary and juniper are all scents to burn and smudge along with sage for a protected and safe space.
Burn all the scents at once, hippy.
Goal
Don’t overdo anything. Even awesome things can harm. Exercise kills more Americans than terrorists or airplanes.