We were an hour into a nice picnic trying to find teenage LARPers sitting on a bench overlooking trees that look like they were melting like candles when she turned to me and told me she couldn’t date me. My mind went blank and the colors of the world became more vibrant and the park […]
Sometimes I think it’s strange that I live in two worlds at the same time. There is the one world where I am a normal dude going to work, riding the bus, wearing sensible but sometimes stylish clothing and engaging in small talk about sports, culture and light politics. Then there is this second world […]
I’m on OKCupid for the second time. I have no idea why I even signed up knowing I’m not good at Internet dating, but I wanted to see what was going on out there. I even went on a couple of dates. They did not go very well. The first girl talked a lot and […]
I made a mistake. I decided to post an inside joke on my blog. I was having Siri read Facebook posts out loud and a friend of mine posted about a local taqueria being nominated best tacos in the west. The comments that followed went from tacos to gentrification, race and hipsterist slander. I wrote […]
Trudging I walked one and a half miles in the rain uphill in total darkness while listening to Ornette Colman without a rain coat with a heavy backpack, and I couldn’t have been happier. Pooping After being sick and diseased, I find myself watching what I poop. I pay attention to how it […]
There are a few things that I’m bad at. One of them is leaving for places. I always leave way too early and end up pacing back and forth in front of where I have to be an hour before I have to be there. I can’t stand waiting to leave for somewhere and feel […]
In real life I’m a funny guy. I’ve written a few blogs that I think were funny and other people told me they LOL’d – whatever that means. I love making people laugh. You can tell me I’m ugly and I’d just shrug my shoulders, you can tell me my fashion sense is dumb and […]
After a person loses everything, after a person digs himself out of the rubble of his life, after the dust settles and he can see the sun again there is nothing. Now that I’ve made it to the other side of disease, homelessness (living with my parents, but still), being broken up with, unemployment and […]
I’m a clean slate. I’m here at the beginning again. I no longer have cancer. All I have is a long painful scar down my front that reminds me its there every time I twist or lift anything heavier than a large book. Not only does it remind me that I’m not healthy yet, but […]
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