Cracked Pot Meditations – 2017 By The Stars

 Meditation for November 19th, 2016 2017 By The Stars Welp, 2016 was a total shit show. A bunch of good people died, the white supremacist took control of the United States of America, and it all started with the death of a gorilla.  Let’s look at the stars and see how 2017 will be.  […]


Meditation for November 19th, 2016

2017 By The Stars

Welp, 2016 was a total shit show. A bunch of good people died, the white supremacist took control of the United States of America, and it all started with the death of a gorilla. 

Let’s look at the stars and see how 2017 will be. 

Shit is not going to get any better. There are FOUR fucking Mercury retrogrades: December 18th – January 8th, April 9th – May 3rd, August 12th – September 5th, December 3rd to December 22nd. This will mean you will feel like you can’t have an intimate relationship with anyone. This is the year for divorce, break-ups, emancipations, and getting fired for HR reasons. 

Venus retrograde is in Aries (May 3rd – April 14th), so here is where you realized that the kind of person you like to have the sexes with isn’t really the kind of person you like having the sexes with. Your tastes and desires will change. Then after you do all the work to get yourself ready for your new tastes, like breaking up and changing your Tindr profile, you will start liking your old preferences again. 

Eclipses in February and August cause people to seek vices to turn away from reality. Get ready for a hell of a heroin epidemic. This also will make people turn away from health care and worker rights and look at self-care and self-help. 

Leo being the home of an eclipse and the north node moving into the Lion’s House, means that people will forsake community and supportive volunteering for chasing the material gains. You will be reminded of the greed and narcissistic tendencies of the late 80s. 

Jupiter will rule 2017 with a celestial iron, or gaseous fist. This will make people starve for love through superficial social gatherings. This will mean the return of the more soulless music scenes like disco and raves. 

When Pluto becomes dominate in the end of the year, debts will be demanded to be repaid. You will be financially, physically, emotionally, and spiritually bankrupt. You will be naked, ruined, and broke. 

You will finish 2017 a broken empty person. You will seek alcohol and cocaine for comfort because the very idea of a sober breath and looking at your reality the way the world exists makes you want to give a 12 gauge shot gun a blow job. 

The deaths won’t stop. Here are the famous deaths you can expect for 2017:

Jimmy Carter

Woody Allen

Zsa Zsa Gabor

Jerry Lewis

Billy Graham (finally!)

Regis Philbin

Cher

Teri Garr 

Burt Reynolds

Mamie Van Doren 

Ned Beatty 

Sidney Poitier

Liza Minnelli

Benji & Joel Madden

Keith Richards

Rob Zombie

Rob Thomas

Pamela Anderson

George Takei

Haley Joel Osment