Meditation for September 14th, 2016
How To Discuss Your Spirituality To Your Skeptic Friend
We all have that one friend who doesn’t believe in anything, doesn’t like anything that other people like and just will argue anything. They also will take any chance they have to debunk your new found spiritual life.
Discussing it may not be your idea, but a skeptic will try and bring it up any chance they get when they aren’t hating the Beatles or how they are so liberal they’d rather have Trump be president since Bernie is dead.
Maybe you do bring it up sometimes, after all this spiritual growth you have been experiencing is making you happy and your friend is not convinced that there is such thing as spirituality. He’ll buy the psychological impact a faith in a supernatural mythos can have on a person, but really it isn’t a God or some sort of force like in Star Wars. You can’t have so much faith in a light saber that it flies through the air and into your hand.
The skeptic might take his busy day of arguing on Facebook and posting memes that belittle other beliefs and is reading really easy to read online essays that strengthen the skeptic’s resolve to question your faith. You need to know how to talk about it.
1. Be proud
Don’t apologize for being a sucker! Own that woo woo bullshit! The more proud you are the less rational thought will sway you.
2. Talk about where you came from
You were an utter hopeless idiotic piece of shit that just struggled in shit crying before you found Hinduism. Always bring up how terrible you used to be as often as possible. If you were a criminal, wear that label on your sleeve because no one will believe you since you are now a boring turd.
3. Float, man
Be cool as a cucumber. Don’t let any skeptical argument heat you up. The minute you get angry or upset, you become wrong. Let the rational thinker get pissed so that they look like an idiot. Always be cool.
4. Have shit
No one cares if you found yoga or Napoleon Hill if you have nothing. You will need more than the skeptic to prove you are on to something. Have a boat, an expensive car, a relationship with either a hot person or a person that has a lot so you have a lot by relationship, a career that is envied by all or have a sweet house. Buddhism and Cheistianity is about being a materialistic success story.
5. Return the favor
Anytime your skeptical friend has problems, point out the lack of a spiritual path might be the issue. When your logical buddy falls down, close your eyes and smile while nodding ever knowingly as you help them up. Doesn’t ever let them see you fall or go through anything.
6. Cryptic
Be as mysterious as possible about your path. Use foreign words even if an English word would have worked. Spirituality should be a secret life and one that is too hard to explain because it is too much for some people. Build as much of a wall between you and your friend with cryptic explanations on what you are doing.
7. Leave (bonus)
If for some reason your friend wants to check your spiritual practice out, say you put that down awhile ago and repeat number 6.