Cracked Pot Meditations – The Dangers of Being a Man

Meditation for July 11th, 2016 The Dangers of Being a Man Being a man is horrible. If you aren’t a man or identify as not a man, then you have have no idea how difficult each day is to wake up a man. We throw around the word privilege like it is this great power […]

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Meditation for July 11th, 2016

The Dangers of Being a Man

Being a man is horrible. If you aren’t a man or identify as not a man, then you have have no idea how difficult each day is to wake up a man. We throw around the word privilege like it is this great power that has been bestowed upon us, but really it is a curse and we would love to have it removed from our little hands.

Everyone is trying to kill you

Yes, that’s right, everyone is trying to kill you. We grow up getting our ass beat trying to be the alpha male on the schoolyard and on the streets and every thug, looky-lou, and dick is trying to kill you to take that position.

You can try to not play reindeer games, but everyone notices and tries to kill you for not being a normal dude trying to murder other normal dudes. Luckily there are laws in most nations that ban the murder of men, but we have wars to let men go kill other men. Women are getting into the action these last hundred years (more recently in the U.S., but the U.S. doesn’t like it’s own women very much), but largely the murdering and war industry is a primarily male business.

Studies have shown that men kill more, are murdered more and all genders fantasize about killing men.

Men can’t even

Men can’t even control their own impulses. They literally act on instinct that society has forbid centuries ago. Men make up the larger percentage of violent crimes. They top every category except for prostitution. Men can’t even keep their cool. They literally hit shit without even choosing to.

Men can’t deal with life at all. They turn to drug abuse and alcoholism more and they suffer from unchecked mental illnesses because it’s “pussy” to get help.

Men don’t mature till they are 25. TWENTY-FIVE YEARS OLD! They have no idea between right and wrong, can’t make complicated solutions and after they turn twenty-five they are too afraid to change their behavior, so fuck it, I’m an asshole till I die. 25, a man can own a gun, join the army, go to prison, vote, and even be a fucking representative in the U.S. fucking congress! A KID WHO HASN’T EVEN MATURED MENTALLY CAN MAKE LAW!

Women mature at 11. Women emotionally mature at 32, while men don’t emotionally mature till they are 43! FORTY FUCKING THREE YEARS OLD!?! You can be a senator and run for president of the United States of America!

Maybe there is an issue there…

Sex is a fucking nightmare

All men do is want sex. All of society is set up to applaud the man who gets a pretty lady to have sex with him. All modern cultural entertainment forms show the men getting the sex from pretty women. For the later part of our childhood and well into our twenties, sex is the most important topic a man knows. He will try to have it a lot.

Well it is frustrating if you can’t have sex as many times as you want and it is more frustrating to not be an attractive person who can even have sex at all without the help of pornography or prostitution which doesn’t help the man see sex healthy.

If there is one thing that most of the mass shooters had in common is that they were men and they were sexually frustrated or confused. Most of them hated women (The U.S. doesn’t show women in the most positive light), and felt betrayed, ignored or even outright rejected by them.

If you blame women for being single, you are showing signs of being a mass shooter.

Because of how men are terrible at impulse control, are idiots when it comes to emotional wisdom, and always trying to kill, women find most strange men to be scary and will be on guard until they see that the man is not a threat.

If you’re gay then you are trying not to be murdered by other men and trying to get by in a culture that caters mostly to heterosexual relationships. Don’t worry, you have drag queen shows.

Here is where patriarchy and privilege sucks

Money is the peacock feathers for men. They spend their entire life making money and blowing it on stupid toys and expensive food cooked by others. The movie industry is making films about every toy and TV show, plus remaking movies from our childhoods. Transformers was a popular toy. Needed a woman’s touch so Megan Fox was added for feminine flair. Men blow their money. Shia Le Bouf wasn’t cutting it, so they added Bostonian badass 90s rapper/underwear model/actor Mark Wahlberg to keep that man money flowing. All the big movies are comic book movies.

Men can’t even stand that because they don’t follow the comic book close enough. Men are losing their cool because they remade Ghostbusters with an all women cast! Luckily the women are also upset because the black woman is too black, but this is about how horrible it is to be a man, not a black actress, right?

We are still culturally touted as the “breadwinner”, but really women can work and live on there own, so why do we even try. Our very existence is threatened. Women don’t need a direct relationship with a man to have offspring. Basically a woman can have a relationship with a man just because it’s retro and novel.

Men will do anything to get by financially. Men are more apt to steal, cheat and engage in shady money making schemes. The whole bank collapse was perpetrated by men. Men made a system and then destroyed it and basically had to have the government go “commie” and give the banks money to save our precious economy. Men did that.

Help me!

Sorry, men don’t talk about their feelings. It isn’t what men do. Does Davy Crocket talk about his shame about stealing Texas from Mexico? Does Andrew Jackson need a hug when he sent Cherokees thousand miles from their home to die in Oklahoma? Does John Wayne need to talk about how hard it is to remain in the closet about being gay his whole life? Does Clint Eastwood get some anger off his chest after embarrassing himself talking to an empty chair like an 8th grade acting monologue going horribly wrong? No, men don’t get that kind of help.

We are stoic. Stiff upper lip. Squared jaw. Squint. We bottle that shit up till we die at 50 or we blow up and lose control of our impulse control and hurt someone or murder. We are murderers and worse because we are a shaken up can of ginger ale.

We like to befriend women to maybe share some of those feelings, but women prefer the company of other women for support, so men are all alone standing in the rain staring at an invisible point thinking and feeling in a cold world that doesn’t care or want to know what we think or feel.

Men love suicide.

And then men die horribly and sooner

After a shitty life of trying not to be murder, murder anyone else, getting over the fact that I matured later in life and that I have to betray masculine behavior to have a healthy relationship with a woman I love, I will shrivel up and die soon.

Men suffer from dementia at a larger rate, lose the ability to physically take care of themselves sooner than women. We don’t die romantic deaths. We don’t just go to sleep and don’t wake up. We get diseases and we pretty much die because life wrings out our testosterone out of us like a dirty bath towel.

You might die young. You also have a larger chance at that too. Testosterone is always making you take riskier behavior. “Look at me!” is famous male last words. We can die in war, jail and just on the streets more likely than women.

God made man and regretted it ever since and has been trying to get rid of us without getting rid of the women. Men keep killing the women and God is trying to make men completely unnecessary.

I hope he does it.

And you think you have problems.