Meditation for April 14th
What’s For Dinner?
What’s for dinner? This is the question that plagues every person every night in every place in America. The bigger the city and the more restaurants there are, the harder it is to answer this question. Couples melt down in grocery stores, living rooms, and cars, looking at the precipice of breaking up every time the other person says, “I don’t know, wherever/whatever you want to eat.”
Who even plans out menus for the week anymore? We wait till it’s hungry time, look around at the plethora of choices, and get shut down by too many options. We open our refrigerators and cupboards over and over again to see the same thing every time. We want what we don’t see or think about. We hope that something will suddenly appear to whet our appetite, or that someone will come up with something delicious.
We have access to every kind of dish. Thai, Italian, Mediterranean, Japanese, Mexican, Korean, Caribbean, German, Chinese, Ethiopian, French, Cajun, French Cajun, Cajun French, New Wave Cajun French, Vietnamese, Greek, Lebanese, Scottish, Pizza, Tacos, Korean Tacos, Tex-Mex, Mex-Tex-Caj-Fre-Tac-Piz, Russian, Fusion, Vegan, Pacific NW, Farm to Table, Jamaican, Honduran, Laotian, Ballpark Fare, Indian, Northern Thai, White Guy Taco Cart, Mission Style Burrito, Williams-Sonoma Style Mexican (Poor Kay Know?), Bar Fare, Hot Dogs, Hot Pockets, Bakery Goods, Gluten-Free Bakery, Atkinson’s-Palm Beach Diet Shacks, Food Carts, Poutine, BBQ, Southern Soul, Chicago Polish Meat Counter, Jewish NY Deli, Breakfast All Day, Hamburgers, Pirate Food, Paleo-Diet, Rice Bowls, Fast Fo, Sandwiches, Falafal, etc, etc, etc.…
All of these choices can be on the same street. All these choices could be in prepackaged microwavable boxes in your freezer from Trader Joe’s, the TV dinner store. The hungrier you are, the harder it is to know what to eat. You can stand on that street and stare at these options, or scroll through some app looking for something to grab you, or you could be home looking at these options in your freezer. You kind of have a hankering for Thai, but you don’t like how you get hungry a half an hour after eating it, but you also love the idea of tacos – cheap and quantity. You feel guilty because you can make your own tacos, but you are hungry now and have no time to gather the ingredients and make them, and that is the one item that Trader Joe’s, the TV dinner store, can’t recreate. As you stand there trying to decide, you die of starvation.
The following is a deleted scene from A Streetcar Named Desire
STELLA: Stanley, take me out. You never take me out anymore.
STANLEY: We don’t have money, baby, we don’t have the money for that!
STELLA: Please? Pleeeeeaaaaasssseee?
STANLEY: OK, what do you feel like?
STELLA: Don’t care; let’s go out somewhere, anywhere!
STANLEY: Wanna try that new BBQ place?
STELLA: Stanley, it’s too hot for BBQ.
STANLEY: OK, how about that hip taco place? The one that looks like a surfing shack and has the line all the time.
STELLA: I don’t want to stand in line. That place is always too busy. Besides, the tacos aren’t that good anyway.
STANLEY: [Now agitated, he starts pacing back and forth] Well, where do you wanna eat?
STELLA: I don’t care, Stan. I told you that, pick somewhere!
STANLEY: I just picked two places, and you turned them down. Why don’t you tell me where you want to eat? You’re the one who wants to go out!
STELLA: This place has a good YELP review. It’s on Jackson and St. Charles.
STANLEY: OK, let’s do it. Sounds good.
STELLA: Oh, never mind, it’s closed on Tuesdays.
STANLEY: What!?! Why is it closed on Tuesdays? Why do things always have to be closed on our days off? That’s dumb. They must not want any money.
STELLA: C’mon, baby, calm down. We’ll find something else. Why not this pasta place in the Garden District? It looks good.
STANLEY: We had pasta yesterday. I don’t want to have pasta twice in a row.
STELLA: No, this is a different kind of pasta place. It’s like Korean, Italian, and Japanese fusion pasta.
STANLEY: I don’t want pasta, Stella!
STELLA: Stanley! Don’t get mad at me. Why not the sushi place that only uses ethically farmed fish? That place sounds good.
STANLEY: I fucking hate sushi, Stella. How long have we been together? You still want to eat at sushi places with me. I don’t want cold fish rolled up in rice like a joint.
STELLA: They have hot food too, Stanley. You like teriyaki chicken, don’t you?
STANLEY: I do, but not tonight.
STELLA: Well, I’ve tried. You’ve turned down everything I’ve suggested. Why don’t you give an idea now?
STANLEY: Chili’s?
STELLA: Chili’s?
STANLEY: Yeah.
STELLA: Fuck, yeah.
STANLEY: TO THE CHILIS!
[They high-five, then wrap each other up and kiss passionately, and then head for the door.]
END SCENE
Craft
Fat Bastard Sick Ass Heart Attack Recipe
Pot of no-bean chili
A pot of three or four packets of Ramen
Four eggs
Hash browns or potato O’Brien’s
Cut up hot dogs
Diced onions
Diced green and red peppers
Cheddar cheese
Drain the Ramen and put it into a skillet.
Pour hot chili over the Ramen.
Place hash browns or potato O’Brien’s on top of the chili,
Place four fried eggs on top of potatoes.
Now place hot dog bits, peppers, and onions on top of that.
Now, place as much cheddar cheese as you can on top of that and melt.
Eat.
Never want to eat again.
Throw up.
Goal
Keep energy bars on your person at all times, so when you have to decide what to eat, you’ll eat an energy bar, and the decision will be a lot easier.
Keep in mind that not deciding what you want to eat will end your relationship, so stop being indecisive and make a choice—especially you, Libra.
Chili’s is always an option.