Meditation for May 14th, 2016
Your Social IQ
How are you with other people? No matter what we try to do, we have to deal with other people. Some people have a much easier time with this than others. The extrovert just simply walks into a room with ease and comfort and commands the people there while the introvert shakes in the corner.
The first step to a good social IQ is seeing the world around you. You are actually not alone in this world. It is a fact that you are not the only real soul in the world and everyone else is your imagination. You are just one in 7 billion plus people. You aren’t the best, nor are you the worse. You are an easily forgotten mediocre human being.
You need to see where you are in the eyes of others. Are you loud, boisterous and opinioned? Then shut the fuck up. If you are a silent shaky shy person then speak the fuck up. Letting fear get the best of you is wasting life. You only have so much time.
Be courteous. Me mindful of how you are going to affect another person by doing whatever it is you do. Walking into a restaurant at five minutes to close and demand a bunch of things just make you an asshole that doesn’t put other people’s feelings and life into account.
Listen. This is the best way to have a high social IQ: by listening. No one wants to hear your stories. Unless your story will be the hit of the night, just sit back and ask a shy person a bunch of questions. You’d be surprised how interesting quiet people are when you aren’t shouting over them. Listen to what a person wants. Sometimes that means listening between the words to hear the real intention.
People are wrong. Sometimes the best thing is to let them be wrong. We aren’t travelling editors and arbiter of knowledge justice. We are wrong all the time too. Does it help to have someone blow up at you for being wrong?
How do you add to a social gathering? How do you make the party even better than if you weren’t there? How do you not get so self-conscience you leave or mope in a corner? How do you not be defiant of possibly having fun? Just try to liven the party up positively and you become a social Einstein!
Prayer
Nanshe,
I am walking into a trap,
Or at least not knowing any of these people feels that way,
But I have to be here.
Give me the power to smile and nod when someone tells me a story about something not interesting; like their kids.
Give me the strength to cock my head to the side and nod as I try and follow the story of how the oldest one is learning Portuguese and not even trying to learn English.
I need your divine intervention to keep me from telling this parent that it sounds like they are creating an uncertain future for their children.
I will need your speed to get me away from that person and to smoke or drink or flirt or try things from the medicine cabinet and have fun.
This person wants to finish their story about the younger one learning Mozart.
I don’t have kids,
And listening to this person talk about kids makes me want to body surf lava naked.
Oh!
It’s been one hour,
I can socially leave ethically!
See ya!
Amen.
Craft
Sometimes parties get dull. They need to be livened up. Try these quick statements to liven up a party.
“You know what movie sucked? The Shawshank Redemption.”
Depending on the crown, “I can’t tell the difference between Radiohead and Coldplay/Prince and Michael Jackson/Mel Tormei and Frank Sinatra.”
“If you cut the rich’s taxes, you’ll have that money trickle down the poor.”
“…He’s not saying he wants to give us stuff for free, he is allocating the taxes differently, so he can…”
“I am a bleeding heart liberal and she is the candidate for me.”
“PC is such fucking bullshit, amirite?”
“All (generalized people) do (stereotype)” Extra points if said generalized person is at the party so all of you guys can ask what’s the deal with that.
“I’m just saying that women can be uncomfortable with a man in a dress coming into their bathroom.”
“The Dalai Llama is an asshole.”
I’m sure you can come up with something that will stir the pot at your particular get-togethers. The way to really get it going is making sure there is a Champion, a person who will champion the cause against your unjust statement, and a Troll, who will take your case and make it worse.
Goal
Stop being the only person in the universe.