One of the times I died, I was playing with some drugs I wasn’t very educated on, and as a result, I did too much, and I remember coming to in an apartment bathtub with ice and frozen veggies on me, and my chest was burning. It wasn’t the first time I almost died, nor […]
I couldn’t find the quote where it says that if you try to protect yourself from sadness you will protect yourself from happiness. This is the perfect quote for where I am today. I sit at the precipice of something amazing and something terrifying. Nicole & I are buying a house here in Providence, Rhode […]
Meditation for March 19th This Moment In the path to mindfulness, we try to live moment by moment. We focus on our breath, ignoring thoughts about the past and the future. When we live in the past, we are depressed, and when we live in the future, we are anxious. We concentrate on the task […]
This is the first day of my brand new life. I woke up today without the crushing sense of dread that comes with waiting to die, even though I was just waiting to find out if I was going to die. I woke up this morning feeling free, which is not as awesome as it […]
I was checking people out at my work when this lady started complaining me about the price of garlic. She kept saying that garlic is the price of chicken. She was very upset that her garlic was ringing up at one dollar and twelve cents, and I could think about was how I’m going to […]
I have my CT scan appointment scheduled next week on the 18th. I got the call last Thursday, and it has reminded me how scared I am. My oncology appointment is on the 20th, so finally I can get a fucking answer.What if you had five years left on earth? What if you actually had […]
Most of my days are spent in terror, but sometimes I think things are okay. I was on the 35 bus cruising down Greeley and watching the dusk turn into twilight, my favorite time of day, and seeing the trains and Forest Park in the background with orange fading into purple cloud fingers tracing the […]
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